Monday, August 17, 2009


This word scares me. It petrifies me. It makes me want to throw up. I have yet to blog on here about my surgeries....I have a blog about them, maybe one day I will transfer them on here, but I have a long sordid history with surgery! So when I was told Chase was going to need SURGERY, it was all I could do to stay strong and positive for my little man. I think that word scared him as much as it did me. Chase has been struggling since he was about 3 with "allergies". He would always get very sick every fall and winter. HIGH HIGH fevers, walking pneumonia the gamut. This year we switched pediatricians and this man listened to my concerns. So began our medicine regimen with Chase. At one point this year he was on 2 steroid inhalers, a steroid nasal spray and singulair! The poor kid! Well at some point he developed swollen lymph nodes in his neck that didn't go away with antibiotics and we started down the road of blood work and CT scans to figure out what was going on. The diagnosis, his adenoids were very swollen and were blocking his airway. So a trip to the ENT confirmed that he needed to have those pesky noids out! I knew it going it, I had a feeling, but I was hoping otherwise! For me, "in & out surgery" "routine procedure" "simple procedure" those phrases mean NOTHING to me!

So, we scheduled it and set out to be as positive as we could with Chase. He was PETRIFIED! We encouraged him this would help him breathe better and hopefully he could be off ALL the meds! He didn't care. He was still scared, rightfully so, surgery is scary for adults...and he is only 6! It broke my heart the day he said to me

"mom, what if they make a mistake on me like they did with you? what then?"

He was 4 when I went through all my surgical nightmares and he remembers very well the pee bag and staying with Granny & Grandpa for 2 months because mommy wasn't well, because the "doctor made a mistake" Boy do I regret ever saying those words to my boy! So we encouraged him he would be just fine. We prayed with him, Granny & Grandpa prayed with him, he got tons of encouragement from Gramma & Aunt Fara & Uncle Owen! But the unknown can be frightening! Especially for a 6 year old!

Well, Daddy was our HERO on surgery day. I was nervous, and it was all I could do not to cry listening to my boy be so frightened. I was proud of myself, I held it together, I was positive. I was in my mode, get there, paperwork etc. etc. But CJ, he was making Chase laugh from the minute we got in the car to go to the hospital!

WE get there, he & Chase dress in their gowns for the O.R. and CJ was putting the hat all the way over his eyes and telling Chase all the cool people wear their hats that way, he got the nurses involved, Chase & I couldn't help but laugh! The nurses were WONDERFUL!

So...CJ took Chase back to the O.R. they would only let one of us go back...Chase wanted CJ & that was fine with me, I couldn't have handled it. CJ had to hold Chase down...then we waited, and in the waiting room the doctor came out, everything went fine, Chase did great, etc. etc. big yucky adenoids, definitely needed to come out, on and on and then I hear my son...SCREAMING!!!!!! It broke my heart. It took my breathe away, I teared up, CJ took my hand, told me to get a hold of myself and they finally came and got us. It felt like an eternity, it was only like 1 minute!

Chase had a hard time waking up from the anesthesia and that was tough for CJ & I. He was in pain and scared. Trust me, I know how awful it feel coming out of General! BUT Chase did do great. We came home, he rested, and was playing the Wii with his brother in 10minutes flat! He was such a brave trooper! He was back to his old self in a few days and we are already seeing some benefits of the surgery. He sleeps better, his breathing isn't so labored when he sleeps, the dark circles under his eyes are gone. Now we wait and see. The time of the year is quickly approaching, we are praying he won't get sick!!!!

I HATED my son having to have surgery! BUT he was great! He got way cool "feel better" presents! My mom gave him a "sunshine bag" and she had something for him to open every day of his recovery(he was supposed to be "calm" for 7 days). He got a cool How To Make Paper Airplane book from Gramma & lots of craft activities! We had fun with all of it! I mean...I never got a "sunshine bag" :-) JUST KIDDING MOM;-) My sunshine was you helping me take care of my boys and me not having to worry!!!!! ;-)

I praise the Lord for answered prayers. We are seeing improvement. Now I pray he won't ever have to have surgery again!
I will never forget Seth looking out the window when we got home. He was so anxious to see Chase. When he saw Chase get out of the car he said " HE IS OK! HE IS WALKING AND AWAKE!!!!! YAY!" Chase walked in and Seth was SO melt my heart sweet. He gently hugged his big brother and said " how are your adenoids Chase are they all better" *sigh* I LOVE LOVE LOVE seeing how much they love each other! When CJ called his mom after the surgery to give her an update, Seth was with her, and he asked my MIL "is Chase awake? is he OK" Sometimes it seems as though he isn't paying attention, but he is, and he was so concerned for his big bro!!!! And when Chase fell asleep, Seth covered him up with his blanket and put all of Chase's favorite toys next to him and even put his own special toys next to Chase to make him feel better" I am getting the chills just remembering how sweet it was watching him! He didn't know any of us were looking:)

*sigh* It is all over...but definitely there were things I wanted to remember! It is a part of their history!

But I have to admit...I am still nauseated thinking of having my own isn't a fear I want to overcome...but I will....with God's help!

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